Category Archives: Message Boards Are for Geniuses

Message Board Geniuses: Why Do They Hate on Auburn?

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Awwww. A Barner has a feel.

Lord Jesus, help this person find the strength to deal with this, as it seems there’s no relenting in the foreseeable future, unless Auburn gets really, really good in a really, really short period of time.

Personally, I don’t ever instigate with a “Go Dawgs”. I’ll only say this to another Georgia fan in solidarity, but I won’t say anything to anyone otherwise. Usually, it’s Alabama fans who’ve been the most vocal, with all the “Roll Tides” and all, but I don’t hear much from Auburn fans, who’ve largely gone dormant over the past decade, it seems.

Just another reminder that Auburn sucks, and will continue to do so for eternity.

Message Board Geniuses: Why Can’t We Be Proper Cheaters Like the Rest of the SEC?

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So it turns out the Judge who was originally assigned the Sorsby case, a Texas Tech alum, has appropriately recused himself to hand it off to a possible A&M or Baylor grad judge, instead. That actually sounds reasonable and appropriate, at least to the judge, but not to Red Raiders fans, who are perplexed as to why they just can’t cheat and steal their way into the CFP, you know, like everybody else.

To be fair, if they needed some pointers in cheating, they need to go out of the SEC and have a conversation with this guy:

What an impressive coaching tree. Six arrests, five firings for cheating, two dismissed for sex crimes, and one who was forced to resign for endorsing *checks notes* slavery. While I researched it and can’t find any evidence about the last one (seems to be a social media urban legend) it’s definitely an impressive resume.

Aim high, Red Raiders! You’ll reach the pinnacle of cheating someday, you just need to be more creative and innovative to do it!

Message Board Geniuses: Mudcat’s Car Strikes Again Edition

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Well, at least we can’t blame this one on the ACCPD.

Geez. Just another typical offseason for the Dawgs.

Message Board Geniuses: This Aggression Will Not Stand, Man

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Shot:

Chaser:

Look, Sark has some reason to be bitter towards Ole Miss, particularly Pete Golding, his former counterpart during their times together with Saban’s Alabama.

According to Wickersham, as Manning’s recruitment came down to the wire, Pete Golding, then Alabama’s defensive coordinator (who now holds the same job at Ole Miss), invoked Sarkisian’s struggles with alcoholism in an attempt to sway him away from the Longhorns while on a call with Manning and his circle of trust. Wickersham explained the moment while speaking with Pablo Torre.

“Pete, who is friends with Sark, says on this call, ‘I love Sark, he’s my best friend.’ And then he’s like oh my god, do I go there? And he did. He goes, ‘I hope he can stay sober,’” Wickersham explained.

After the call, Manning’s high school coach Nelson Stewart called Golding directly, saying “Pete, that’s f—ed up!”

Don Saban, with two henchman at his side, circa 2019.

Unlike the former OC he took over for, Sark made his recovery and didn’t turn it into a narcissistic showcasing of his new namaste philosophies on life. Just went back to work and got right. Good for him.

And I ask…what’s the matter with basket weaving?

Especially the underwater course? I declare!

Message Board Geniuses: Bananas, Bananas, B-A-N-A-N-A-S

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You can play concerts in Sanford, you play football in Sanford, you can have commencements and Olympic soccer at Sanford. But, by God, you’d better not let the Savannah Bananas play there:

I mean, it seems like the kids had fun, and people were out to tailgate and see them like it was a home football game. Methinks it’s kind of popular.

I mean, if you let Yell Leaders exist at your home stadium, you can’t really argue with allowing a parody baseball team playing there, can you?

Would you have this reaction if The Bananas came to Sanford Stadium?

Your Daily Gator and MBG – championship or bust edition

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Oh my … the north Florida Axe body spray wearing, Busch Light swilling, trailer park trash are out after the Handbags get bounced on the tournament’s first weekend.

I hear from credible sources that Hogtown is a great basketball town now.

Discuss.

Bammer MBGs – wishful thinking edition

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As Bugs Bunny would say …. What a maroon!

Some people need to have their message board privileges taken away … especially, those that have trouble with basic spelling and grammar.

Better to remain silent and appear to be stupid than to type on your keyboard and remove all doubt, Bruh.