Category Archives: Smells Like Corn Dogs

The weekend that was at MBG – week 6 edition

Posted on by
22
You just lost to John Mateer.

Saturday was glorious. I hope the pollsters find some reason to continue to disrespect us and move Notre Dame to #1. Anyway, on a day like this the message boards once again didn’t disappoint and our geniuses didn’t show up even when it felt the game may be slipping away.

Let’s start today’s trip in Louisville on Friday night for Mike Norvell’s throwing away all of his goodwill from the week before away with 1 play call.

On the road up 14 and instead of going up by 3 scores, Norvell decides to go for it on the 2 yard line and then calls a play where the ball gets thrown behind the line of scrimmage. I don’t know if a field goal there changes the eventual outcome, but it allowed the floodgates to open on the next play from scrimmage when Louisville has a 97 yard run to cut the lead in half. If you’re going to go for it there, either line up and run or make sure you throw the ball into the end zone.

Norvell is a dead man walking at this point. The question is whether they can raise the money to buy out his contract plus his assistants.

Ouch.

Let’s move on to Hogtown where it hasn’t taken long for the Handbags’ season to start free fallin’.

-3 turnover margin gets you beat most Saturdays, and, most of the time, that team gets run out of the building. Giving up 10 of 16 3rd downs is not a good look for a Handbag defense that has multiple loseable games on the schedule left on the schedule. I wonder what the ticket market for the Cocktail Party on the Gator side of MBS is like right now as they get ready to head to Austin for a date with Texas who deep down knows their faceplant in Hogtown last fall was the reason they weren’t in the CFP.

Jonny Boy is finding out really quickly how fickle Handbags are. At this point, the Florida-FSU game may end up on the ACC Network+.

Let’s head to CoMo to check on the mental state of Drink’s latest beatdown victim … Texas 8&4.

That first post is truly genius worthy, or maybe a T-sip posing as an Aggie pulls a great troll.

Could the Missouri game in November end up as the biggest home game of the year? After the last 2 weeks, that appears likely now. Texas A&M is officially on tilt after their defense gets shredded for 252 rushing yards.

On the other side, this stat line is horrible.

Yikes.

At 3-3, it could get ugly for Elko because the Aggie oilmen are more than happy to pay another buyout.

Speaking of little brothers, let’s look in on the Greater Opelika Cow College’s preparation for the DSOR (Dawgs, be loud on Saturday … no letdown).

Auburn fans are as bad as Tech nerds over their never-ending obsession with all things Bama. I’m not going to watch the Sa(t)an documentary for many reasons, but seeing a Barner call any program a bunch of cheaters is rich.

Let’s head to the west coast where the preseason national champions’ season is going up in smoke.

7 turnovers. 20:00 of time of possession. 73 yards rushing. 1 for 12 on 3rd down. Damn, just damn, Dan.

If Kirby decided he has had enough, Lanning would no longer be on my list of coaches I would want to pursue. He has every advantage a first time head coach would want, yet he finds ways to lose games where his team is more talented.

Let’s head to Dallas to check on the status of “Texas is back!” after Sark and Arch fail yet again.

To the genius that fires a stray at Kirby, I’m sure Kirby is worried about your opinion. Texas gets exposed by Oklahoma’s defense, and the Archduke is officially out of the Heisman race after throwing 2 backbreaking picks in the 4th quarter. Steve Sarkisian has to be looking at the fine print in his contract after this one. Oklahoma was dreadful on offense again, but Mateer makes 2 throws that make all the difference in crunch time.

That “best team money can buy” strategy appears to be exploding in Texass’s face. Speaking of programs overspending on NIL …

Let’s head back to horse/bourbon country to check in with the Corn Dogs after losing to Kentucky.

I know a lot of LSU fans aren’t that smart, but that genius doesn’t understand the basics of what $19 million really means. A quick Google search mentioned the following: A waterfront mansion in Ft. Lauderdale, a super-yacht, or a portfolio that generates $760k a year (conservatively without touching the principal).

On to the game itself, Kentucky goes for the win in the first overtime for the 2nd week in a row and lives to tell about it. If this keeps up Will Stein may be in line for SEC CotY. There isn’t a game left on the schedule that Kentucky can’t win starting on Saturday night in Norman where they open as a 6.5 point underdog.

On the other side, LSU is fortunate the game went to overtime after 2 turnovers in their own territory both resulted in no points. The Cajuns adored Kiffin in December and are now turning on him in October. They still have upcoming games against Texas and Alabama which I’m sure Disney will put at night in Death Valley.

This will hurt:

Let’s move on to our last spot of the night … west Alabama where the Dawgs win with a flair for the dramatic.

There’s been plenty of cloud storage used over the 36 hours about the officiating and the embarrassment of Fowler and Herbstreit. Dawg in Austin’s observations post from yesterday is a tour de force in analysis if you haven’t yet read it.

My take on Saturday night is that this was a win for the culture and values of the program as created by Kirby Smart. I have said for 10 years now that Kirby took the Process of Saban and put a human face on it.

Connection – Even when Sacovie muffed the punt (thank goodness for Blake Stewart), Kirby and some players made it clear that they were behind him. He made a clear fair catch of the next one.

Composure – It would have been easy for the team to lose their composure as Alabama turned the game in the 2nd quarter, but clearly the team did not leave the field for halftime discouraged.

Resilience – The first drive of the 2nd half was resilience in action. That was coming off the mat and pulling up the defense after the late 2nd quarter drive.

Physicality – The drive chart of the 2nd half was a beauty to behold: 8 plays, 75 yards, 4:22 (TD); 11 plays, 69 yards, 6:20 (Missed FG); 10 plays, 84 yards, 5:19 (FG); and 8 plays, 40 yards, 3:10 (End of game).

G.A.T.A.

What did you see this weekend that made you laugh out loud? Let us know in the comments.

The weekend that was at MBG – week 3 edition

Posted on by
Maybe those pros would have helped you

We had a weekend with some upsets and one location of hate that boiled over in the genteel hamlet of Oxford. We had an inexplicable loss in College Station and a rout in Fayette Nam.

Let’s start our trip around the message board universe in Music City.

To say that loss is head scratching is an understatement. How you lose that game is a systemic failure across coaches and players. I didn’t see the run-up to the game’s last play, but if Doeren didn’t know if the QB knew what to do, call time out and tell him exactly what you want him to do. If you don’t trust Bailey to execute the plan, tell the punter to take the ball and run out of the back of the end zone for a safety or just punt.

Given some of the struggles Vandy has had this year so far, I expect us to inflict a lot of pain in 2 weeks’ time.

Here’s a brief text thread I had with a good friend who is a Pack fan (Dawg fan now, too).

Let’s move on to Fayetteville where the suits in Birmingham are keeping the Razorbacks down.

Both of the DPI calls were legitimate. Of course, the 2nd one should have never happened because Bobo should have run the ball on 1st down and scored. Of course it did lead to Helton’s clean-out of the Arkansas left side of its defense.

I admit I was worried that we weren’t going to be focused. After the first offensive series, that concern quickly disappeared. It does seem like a lot of us have gotten a bit spoiled about winning with style points.

Let’s head to back to the South Carolina Upstate where some geniuses don’t seem to like the makeup of the Clemson roster.

Clemson beats North Carolina (how long is the Belichick experiment going to continue) again. The Tigers scuffed around and eventually got the win, but UNC ran for a bunch of yards. Other than the Miami game, Clemson probably does have the talent (other than what the genius thinks) to win every other game on the schedule. They head out west for ACC After Dark in Berkeley (shakes head) before turning around to host Miami. If Saturday night goes sideways, there is no telling what folks in Greater Anderson will do.

Let’s head to Tuscaloosa where the Seminole faithful think Dumbo is their only hope after another loss post 63-3.

Florida State competed with Alabama until they didn’t. This game is a a perfect example of what the middle 8 are all about. Bama is down 21-6 entering the middle 8. They leave the middle 8 up by 2 after a TD on the opening drive of the 2nd half. Norvell completely mismanaged the end of the 2nd quarter especially on FSU’s last real possession before the half. Run it 3 times there and get a first down to then go hurry up or force Alabama to use their timeouts if they wanted to get the ball back. After the 2nd down sack, DeBoer smelled blood in the water and went after it. Still, FSU cut the lead to 7 late but then couldn’t get one more stop in Tuscaloosa.

The Alabama program has fallen so far off its perch that the crowd was doing the War Chant at the end of a game that honestly FSU had no business even being competitive in.

On the topic of the genius’s post, I’m sure Jimmy Sexton would love for those in Tallahassee to hire his client to wake up the echoes of Seminole football. After the way things ended in College Station with the best roster money can buy, I can’t see him bringing things back.

And speaking of geniuses with a smartphone.

Anytime Kanell twiXes, he ends up being community noted all over the place. Maybe he just wants the engagement, but the way people dunk on him online makes you feel sorry for him … almost.

Let’s cruise on down to College Station where once again Texas 8&4 is showing their true colors.

Every time the Aggies lose, their geniuses make light of Mike Elko’s weight. The real problem is that Marcel Reid is consistently overrated. He’s a turnover machine with both interceptions occurring deep in Kentucky territory where they killed scoring chances. Of course, Elko goes for a 4th and 1 in the red zone on the game‘s first drive and they don’t get it. Elko is talked about as this defensive genius, but 3 of Kentucky’s 4 TD drives are 75 yards or longer. That’s pretty lousy to me. He won games at Duke … big damn deal … he’s in the big leagues now and is probably going to a get a whopper of a buyout in a couple of year.

I hear Columbia, South Carolina is nice this time of year. The Cock faithful take it on the chin again but keep coming back for more.

I said before the season in the MP question that Shane Beamer was going to be the first head coach shown the door. After losing to Mississippi State, I see no reason to back off that prediction. South Carolina fans are a special breed … they keep buying tickets and supporting the program just to get let down by the program when it has a chance to make something positive happen. Kamario Taylor is becoming all of the things people said 18 months ago about LaNorris Sellers. That has to sting Gamecock fans.

Once again, unless something changes quickly, the Clemson-South Carolina game is looking like an old Jefferson Pilot noon game called by the Daves. It may be a loser leaves town kind of game if things go sideways.

Let’s check on the friendly folks from Norman after their near escape against New Mexico.

Oklahoma scores 14 and only runs for 61 yards against New Mexico. Barry Switzer has to be fit to be tied watching this (I honestly don’t know the status of his health) knowing that his Oklahoma teams would drop 70+ on teams like this back in the day. Oklahoma drops to #24 in the coaches poll and completely out of the AP poll. I expect the Sooners to put up a fight in Athens on Saturday afternoon. Sooner X is not hopeful at all about this weekend.

Our final stop is to check in on the Corn Dogs whose mouths wrote a check too big for their team to cash.

I didn’t stay up for the full game on Saturday night, but Ole Miss took it to LSU in the 1st half and still almost let it slip away. Of course, the Kiffin Kancer made the postgame all about what he did to make Ole Miss football matter to their fan base. Trinidad Chambliss is a special player no doubt about it. They aren’t going to finish the season unbeaten if they can’t run for more 60 yards in a game with a mobile quarterback. I wasn’t sold on either team entering the season, and I’m still not.

There are some special people on LSU message boards and the first post tagged is proof of that. By the way, I don’t think Chambliss should be playing.

That’s it for this week. If you saw something funny, let us know in the comments.

Joey d’Eau Douce Is Playing Tricks Again

Posted on by

Kiffin was one of the first ones last year to have fun with the mandated SEC injury reports, when he initially listed nearly 30 Ole Miss players as “doubtful”. To no one’s surprise at all, he got called out on it and all the doubtful players miraculously played.

Well, it’s 2026, and looks like you teach an old bitch new tricks, can’t you?

Your star QB is doubtful? And White Weeks has been at press conferences this week and looked happy and healthy as a clam.

C’mon, Lane. Ain’t nobody buying this anymore.

MBG update – Go touch some grass edition

Posted on by

Corn Dogs gonna Corn Dog. Although the flip side with Ole Miss wouldn’t surprise me, I’m sure the athletic association is letting frat boys run wild in Vaught-Hemingway. If I were at Ole Miss frat boys, I would be chasing some Ole Miss sorority girls instead.

Another meteor game on the horizon this Saturday.

Lane Kiffin, Chess Master

Posted on by

It was all just sound and fury, after all?

If there’s one person out there, whether you hate him or love him, who wouldn’t mind burning the business down on his way out, it’s probably Lane Kiffin.

Given the slings and arrows he endured as he exited Oxford, it’s hard not see how he could have some feelings about his indictment as a turncoat in modern college football. Transfers everywhere, people chasing a bag, so why not…and, oh, a loophole that allows 2022 players an extra year of eligibility to boot? Lane saw an opportunity for chaos, and jumped at the chance.

let’s pour gasoline on the fire and see what happens…because some people get a kick out of watching the fire department do their damndest to fight to extinguish something that’s impossible to put out.

Meanwhile, Lane has shifted from courtroom antics to locker room antics.

It sounds like he’s trying to channel his inner Kirby while also embracing the idea that he’s happy to kick a person when they’re down. He’s trying to make LSU a feared program again, and will use any fabricated voodoo to get there.

Gotta say, I’m impressed. Somehow in the midst of it all he’s had an expose book written about his horndog lifestyle in Tuscaloosa, tattled about tampering, abandoned a college football program as they were heading to the CFP, and all anyone can talk about is court and eligibility of pro players, whom he won’t even roster in the end.

And a 51-10 ass whipping of Clemson.

Lane decided that, instead of hating the PR machine for what it is, he’d hack it and use it to his benefit to rebrand himself as the villain of college football, a rogue badass who will now lay wate to everyone in his path, and not as Joey Freshwater anymore.

Good show, Lane.

Holy Corn Dogs, Batman!

Posted on by

Life comes at you fast, Tigers.

This entire thing has gotten ugly and has turned into a 15 vs. 1 game of chicken.

The B1G is the only conference that can match SEC money, and there’s no way they admit them due to academic reputation. LSU cannot survive as an independent.

LSU fans, is all of this worth Lane Kiffin? The Kancer seems to have metastasized.

Meanwhile, LSU fans online.

What do you think, Refugees?

Sum Or All…Going All In on Bravado at SEC Media Days

Posted on by

Lord, it was blowhard day in Tampa, Florida.

First, from Pete Golding and how he kept Chambliss in Oxford:

Sure, Pete. It had nothing to do with lawyers, either, did it?

Meanwhile, new Handbags Coach John Sumrall was about to go all WWF on the media when a phone went off during his tirade.

No, he won’t back down from proper electronics usage. Maybe focus on avoiding this, instead:

Don’t lose to the ACC. Make that an imperative and maybe the rest of the conference can take you seriously.

Wishing him the worst of luck in the year ahead.

Reseeding the CWS Would Result in Another SEC Tournament?

Posted on by

Check the crowd pop on this one:

I would’ve paid good money to see this as COSM in Atlanta, provided they had this view of the game from the venue.

Go Dawgs…meanwhile, here’s the matchups for the CWS:

Yes, that’s right…All-SEC on one side of the bracket. Hmm. What would it look like with a reseeded bracket:

#1 Georgia vs. #8 Troy

#2 UNC vs. #7 Oklahoma

#3 Texas vs. #6 Ole Miss

#4 Alabama vs. # 7 West Virginia

Then it would just be an All-SEC CWS, would it not?

Just imagine…also imagine if the Supers were reseeded…some different outcomes could’ve occurred:

1 Georgia vs. 16 Little Rock

2 Auburn vs. 15 Cal Poly

3 UNC vs 14 Troy

4 Texas vs. 13 St. John’s

5 Alabama vs. 12 Oklahoma

6 Oregon vs. 11 USC

7 Mississippi State vs. 10 Ole Miss

8 Kansas vs. 9 West Virginia

Well…guess what…you still would’ve only had five SEC teams in the CWS brackets…and Auburn would’ve been one of them…plus you would’ve had a B1G team in it, too.

Nah, maybe I like it just the way it is.

I’ll Tell If You Tell

Posted on by

Pete Golding, with a stern retort to the idea that the NCAA is going to investigate him and Ole Miss’s tampering allegations:

MIRAMAR BEACH, FL – Ole Miss coach Pete Golding, at the center of a high-profile NCAA investigation into alleged tampering, has informed the NCAA he will expose rampant tampering in the sport if sanctioned, a person close to the situation told USA TODAY Sports.

Golding declined comment to USA TODAY Sports when asked Wednesday if he threatened the NCAA — but spoke at length on tampering problems in college football.

“I think a lot of things make headlines,” Golding said. “There’s a lot more people involved that everybody might not know. I’m not gonna sit up here and say whatever we did or we didn’t do, was it right or was it wrong? But, you know, when you go through what we went through (with tampering), and what you’re seeing day-in and day-out, some things you feel like shouldn’t matter that, you know, they’re making a big deal about.”

In truth, it’s the offseason, so there is probably more being blown up about this than it would receive were it during the season. But, for some reason, Golding is the first coach to get really called out on it AND have the threat of NCAA investigations to follow. Tampering has been alleged for as long as the portal and NIL have been a thing, but something about this has a stink to it.

Is it that no one can believe Ole Miss is this good? You don’t hear the same for the Indianas and Miamis of college football who thrive off this, so why Golding and Ole Miss? Is it because Golding killed Alabama’s defense and King Saban is giving the thumbs down from afar?

If Golding decides to sing, let me be the first to say it’d would make me happy to give me more blogging fodder, but do I think anything would happen to anyone as a result?

Nah. But it would worth buying some extra popcorn, wouldn’t it?

IPTAY: I’ll Pay Ten Attorneys, Y’all

Posted on by

Dabo versus Golding ain’t over yet, folks

According to documents obtained by ESPN through an open-records request, an NCAA associate director of enforcement emailed Ole Miss senior associate athletic director for compliance Taylor Hall on Jan. 23, a couple of hours before a news conference in which Swinney blasted Golding for allegedly tampering with Ferrelli, who, after transferring from California, had enrolled at Clemson before then leaving for Ole Miss.

“Thanks for speaking with us earlier today,” the associate director wrote in the email to Hall. “As we discussed, the enforcement staff is opening an investigation into the football program at the University of Mississippi. Additionally, please let this email serve as a reminder that the institution and its representatives have an affirmative and automatic duty under Bylaw 19.2 to preserve all relevant materials.”

In the email, the associate director requested that Golding’s university-issued cell phone and personal phones be forensically imaged. The NCAA also requested the same of phones used by Ole Miss general manager Austin Thomas, inside linebackers coach Jay Shoop, outside linebackers coach Matt Kitchens, director of player personnel Jai Choudhary and senior associate athletic director for strategy/cap management Matt McLaughlin.

The NCAA also asked that Ferrelli’s phones be forensically imaged and that each individual’s phone records from December 2025 to January 2026 be submitted to enforcement staff.

An Ole Miss official declined comment when contacted by ESPN on Friday. Clemson also declined to comment.

Well. I thought they were just going to sweep this under the rug and everything, but it looks like it’s not dead, yet.

Question is, what makes this unique enough to warrant this level of investigation, versus the countless other allegations of tampering we’ve head about in recent years? Was it because Dabo came out publicly and had receipts? Was it because Ole Miss already had eyes on them for other reasons?

Inquiring Minds would like to know. What’s more important is that, somehow, Golding is making this guy look like he was a moral figurehead at Ole Miss.

That’s some heavy lifting, as they say.