The geniuses are back. Rather than talking about their bathroom habits or what they would do to get so-and-so player and coach, they are showing their ball-knowing to the world. Week 1 this year wasn’t likely to be to be a gold mine of genius, but we got enough on our trip to get some good laughs.
Let’s start today’s trip at Smart-Richt Field at Vince Dooley Stadium as the Jacketasses’ season collapses on the season’s first real night of games.
No one cares enough about Fech football to send genius posts from StinkTalk, but I’m here for you. 2 years ago the denizens of StinkTalk thought Brent Key was the reincarnation of Booby Dudd and Booby Ross, and he was going to get Kirby Smart fired at Georgia. Today, he’s another likely failure of a head coach on North Avenue.
To get physically manhandled by Coach Amazon Prime’s Buffaloes to the tune of 183 to 51 yards rushing should embarrass Mr. Tough Guy. Let’s follow the defensive statistics of Colorado throughout the year. That should tell us something when Thanksgiving weekend rolls around. Pain.
Let’s head a little downtown to Mercedes Benz Stadium to check on the geniuses of the Greater Opelika Cow College.
If that performance did anything for male enhancement in east Alabama, Auburn is in for a long season. Auburn wins because Dave Aranda goes for the win in regulation rather than playing for overtime. Auburn’s defense made DJ Lagway look serviceable, and Byrum Brown threw 3 picks. This Baylor team is far from the best team Auburn will face this year, so it’s not going to be pretty by the time the Iron Bowl rolls around.
On the other sideline …
Dave Aranda has run out of time in Waco without a dramatic turnaround. I give him credit for going for the win with the 2 point play, but the right play probably was to play for overtime. The guy is a defensive genius, but I don’t think he’s cut out to be the leader of the program … sort of like Will Muschamp.
This may be a good way to look at those 2 QBs:
Let’s move west to Tulsa to check in on Oklahoma’s little brother.
I don’t care about Oklahoma State football at all, but that post less than a year after “I’m a man! I’m 40!” got fired in Stillwater makes me laugh. Getting punked by double digits by Group of 5 Tulsa is not going to make the Big 12 look good to the committee. No matter what people say, the Big 12 is at best a 1 bid league given its make-up is more like a G6 league than a P4. I’m guessing the Pokes are happy that Bedlam isn’t going to be played this year, but, OTOH, on Saturday in Stillwater, they host …
Let’s head out west to check on the Handbags of the Northwest, Oregon.
Here’s the extent of ball-knowing in Eugene. The Ducks escape 34-27 over Boise, who isn’t close to the best teams Oregon will play this year. The team statistics look like Oregon should have smashed Boise like a top 5 team should do to solid G6 program, yet they needed a late touchdown to get the win. Nike is going to make sure Dante Moore gets a ton of hype for his Heismanesque performance against the Broncos.
If the pollsters do their job this weekend, I would expect that the Dawgs move past Oregon to #2 in the rankings released on Tuesday.
Let’s move on to Ann Arbor to check in on what appears to be the next scandal involving Michigan football.
Any Michigan fan who stormed the field on Saturday night after beating Western Michigan should be embarrassed. The way it happened should be an embarrassment to the B1G and its officials. That rationalization is never used at any other point in a game. A similar play would have never been reviewed for that particular issue.
Tim Brando gets something right for a change.
Also, it seems the MAC wants to keep those sweet Big 10 checks flowing:
Something stinks about this whole thing.
Let’s move on to the Bayou to check on the fleeting pulse of the Greater Anderson Cow College football program.
The Upstate South Carolina faithful seem to have had enough. Dabo Swinney is 121-46 without Deshaun Watson and Trevor Lawrence. Entering Death Valley on Saturday night, Clemson is 47-20 since Lawrence took his hair and talents to Northeast Florida. I don’t think many people expected Clemson to win in Baton Rouge. I know people didn’t expect Clemson football program to spontaneously combust on Saturday night either.
The benefit of the remaining schedule is that Clemson plays all of 1 currently ranked opponent.
This is cold:
Not really true but funny nonetheless.
Let’s move on to Music City to see the pucker factor for Ole Miss rise to meteoric levels.
If you gave up 38 to Louisville and needed a punt snapped over the head of the punter to provide one of the TDs, keep rationalizing, Rebels. The Kiffin Kancer is coming, and I imagine he is planning to lay waste to Oxford given they gave up almost 500 yards and a number of explosive plays.
While this week’s game in Austin is the meteor game of the century for me, the Magnolia Bowl is setting up to be a meteor game as well. Both fan bases are being insufferable for different reasons.
We’re going to finish our trip last night under the sort-of lights of Doak Campbell.
I didn’t stay up to watch the full game. The message boards geniuses want Norvell out yesterday. I’m sure every one of them will be happy to contribute their 401k’s to his massive buyout to make it happen. The power outage is symptomatic of the problems FSU is having right now. They have a chance to make a statement on national TV, and they have this happen. They have been a joke at QB since Jordan Travis’s injury. They have been awful on the offensive line since Dumbo was there.
Kirby broke them in Miami. Danny Kanell still isn’t over it … he had us #12 in weekend rankings.
That’s what I saw this weekend. I can’t wait to see which 2 fan bases in this coming weekend’s meteor games meltdown.
I tell ya man, that roughing the kicker penalty on Louisville was a little..eh..bammerrific itself to me. All of a sudden Ole Miss gets bammer calls? Why the need for them to be SO AWESOME all of a sudden?
And is LSU THAT good?
It probably should have been running into the kicker, but regardless, you aren’t going to block a long field goal from the edge. Field goal blocks come from penetration on the inside with big men getting their hands up (see Carter, Jalen and Davis, Jordan). You tell that guy on the edge to hold his place.
Don’t tell Colorado.
My point is that most roughing penalties on FGs come from the guy on the end of the line of scrimmage. If you don’t get your hand on the ball, you take the chance of penalty.
I watched most of the FSU game. SMU tried their hearts out to give FSU the game with 4 turnovers. ESPN showed a stat of teams being 1-40 with 4 turnovers. Can’t recall the context (ACC or Power-4, last 5 years), but it became 2-40 last night. They simply refused to pass the ball until it was too late. Boos all night. Sad.
My SIL was there last night. I want to hear his thoughts on everything that happened on and around the field.
EE I have looked forward to this about as much as the games themselves. Nice work as always. I love this series.
It does my heart good to see the Miami Vice villain, Pete Golding having an encounter with reality. I have mentioned this a few times but that loss to those pretenders put a bad taste in mouth I haven’t experienced since Kirby became coach. It was why I wasn’t around during the off-season. I didn’t even want to think about football until it was just about time for a new season.
Boy things have cratered at Clemson. Personally I think Kirby has a lot to do with that. Guys they used to get are now the kind of players coming to Georgia. I mean I don’t think Kirby would be have screwed up with the Deshaun Watson recruitment the way Richt did. I was never a believer in Dabo as a HC and I guess no Venables and having Kirby in Athens has left him with no smoke and mirrors. I wonder who they go after. I have heard Schuman mentioned as a possibility.
Buddy Tech just refuses to get their shit together and I’m here for it. Key is innthe Fish Fry mold as far as being hateable. Geoff was so obviously in over his head and just robbing them that I sort of liked him.
Call me crazy but to me the clock is just ticking on the Lane Train derailing. The talking heads love him being down there and want him to win big. I don’t know when it will happen, I only know it will happen, he is going to mash the fool button and hold it down. His exit from Baton Rouge will be the same as everywhere else. Why would they be special? They are going to wish they had never heard of him.
Florida State has turned into a comedy act. I personally love to see it. Being a South Ga boy I know way too many Georgia “fans” who jumped on that band wagon innthe nineties and had no convenient way back home once Kirby got things rolling. They were awful mouthy up until Thst point though and they deserve every bit of this.
Mike, as one SOWEGAn to another, I appreciate the kind words and glad you like the feature. I enjoy writing it except when our geniuses appear.
Yeah we do have some geniuses. Here’s hoping the Dawgs play so well all season that they stay quiet.
Mike, I grew up in Thomasville and watched a lot of Thomasville people jump on the Bobby Bowden train when they were on top back in the 80’s. My dad was a big GA fan and we despised the cockiness from their fans. What a mighty fall it has been, and I love seeing it!!
It was funny onetime last nite when Norvell decided to go on 4th and 3 from midfield. Announcers said is was a bold move. My take is he has a huge buyout. Why not try it? He has no real ties to fsu. He’s gonna take the money and run. Football today, what a way to make a living!!
I read an article from out of Soonerland and the correlation of Dabo’s success with Venebles tenure at Clemson is pretty damning. Swinney’s record was mid before he got there and mid since he left.
Watching our Dawgs dominate, tech, noles, clempsun lose and near misses by Oregon, Michigan and Auburn was very entertaining. Helps take the focus off of all that’s wrong with CFB for a moment.
Dabo is gone and not sure anyone takes him including ESPN. Maybe Fox. He’ll need to rehab and Saban isn’t around anymore to offer a job.